I am not going to be so bold as to say we can eradicate the fear of being judged. What I am suggesting is that there are tools to help us navigate around our fears, the fears that stop us from doing things because we are scared of being judged.
The thing is – we are all scared of being judged. But for some, this can prevent them from doing the things they love and living the life they want. Maybe for you, the thought of being judged is enough to stop you from doing something you’ve only allowed yourself to fantasize about.
Perhaps you find that you waiver; that there are times when the thought of being judged doesn’t faze you at all, and other times when it feels debilitating.
To travel through fear, you need to be willing to take the risk to live your life your way and be able to find comfort despite others’ discomfort. A resilience can build over time, in the form of self-confidence, to help us combat the fear of being judged.
One of the most important ways you can do this is to stop judging others. When you stop judging others, or at least make an concerted effort to stop gossiping, believing that other peoples’ decisions are wrong and ruminating on others people lives and choices, life can get a whole lot easier. You no longer feel like you are living under a microscope when you stop treating others that way.
Another important way of actualizing a sense of fearlessness is to stop giving away your power to others. Stop allowing yourself to ‘buy’ into the opinions and views of others so much that you allow others to decide what is and isn’t available for you.
You can harness your inner power by honing the skill of following your heart (aka what matters to you). Learn to keenly listen to your inner knowing, and follow the parts of you that are attempting to guide you towards your highest good. The parts of you that know what feels good. Instead of worrying about what your family, friends, colleagues, or society might think.
It has nothing to do with operating with blatant disregard of others, not at all. You can still move from a kind center, as long as you are moving in a direction that is honest and gentle.
I am pretty resilient, but there are times when I feel I’ve become ungrounded because I have given too much attention to someone’s opinion; someone that hasn’t earned the respect in my life to have an opinion.
In a recent interview, I heard Brené Brown mention that if someone isn’t in the same arena, taking the same risks, putting themselves out there in the same way, she isn’t interested in what they have to say. This advise was a potent wake-up call for me. It gave me permission to continue forging my path with a renewed commitment to myself to be even more selective in whose opinions I allow to penetrate my emotional body.
To summarize:
1) Stop judging others
2) Learn to follow your desires versus what others want you to do
3) Only accept feedback from those who are dealing with similar experiences in their lives; keep in mind that you get to choose what advice you bring into your inner world.
If we could all learn to be less judgmental on ourselves, the world would be a much kinder place.
With love
Noelle
P.S If you find these messages beneficial, please help me share my message. Forward to a Friend, Follow my blog, or share on FB.