A new year is all about change, about looking towards the future and letting go of the past year. Of transition. Of change. Of imagining a better future.
This process often results in us trying to create ‘resolutions’ that are about what we don’t have or how we are lacking in some areas of our life – most people create resolutions from a place of scarcity instead of from a place of abundance.
I adore the transition from one year to the next. However I have stopped setting intentions that leave me feeling like a failure or adds stress to my life.
I do two things. First, I do a year review. I write down all the things I have accomplished this past year, all my successes, big and small. My observations include, personal growth, how I successfully moved through challenges, things I am proud of in my family and in my home, health & wellness and career/business successes. You can modify the list to whatever best represents your life. When I follow this process it leaves me with a sense of accomplishment. I get to actually see the successes I would have otherwise not given any attention to.
The second part of is setting intentions for the future. I believe HOW we set goals is more important than what goals we set. We need to set intentions that are reachable, and this is more easily achieved by considering how you want to feel.
Instead of thinking about what you want, start thinking about how you want to feel. The difference is that when you decide how you want to feel, you can move more intuitively towards that goal because you understand the objective on a visceral level, and the quality of that new feeling experience is amazing in the body. It feels lighter and enjoyable. It motivates.
Intentions are reachable when they inspire us, or challenge us to show up in new ways for ourselves. To believe we are capable of these new goals and image what the process getting there will feel like.
If reaching your goals requires you to become a different person (one who suddenly, spontaneously likes the gym, for example), chances are you’re not going to get far in the process. Sitting on a stationary bike to burn 500 calories is not inspiring and can be lonely and boring unless you can source the energy for your workout from a deeper, more useful place. Such as knowing your good health will keep you around longer with more energy for living a life worth living.
If you want to feel healthy and connected to your community, join a group of like-minded individuals and get fit together. You can also solicit your friends and choose to support each other by setting days and times each week you will meet up for yoga, the gym, swimming, skiing etc.
If you want to attract something new — a relationship, a career — consider exactly how you want to feel. Be clear and detailed about what you want to feel, spend time imagining what being in a relationship with someone who has those qualities feels like instead of being fearful of finding someone who will bring in the same issues as you’ve experienced in past relationships. If you are considering a career change, be mindful about why you want it. Be clear about the process instead of the outcome, allow your thoughts to move towards how you want to feel instead of fixing on all the things that are wrong in your current state.
When you focus on what you don’t want, you end up following the path of what you don’t want instead of focusing on what you do want.
To create successful intentions, you must think about how you want to feel. Challenge yourself in ways that you can be accountable, find ways to push beyond your beliefs of what you think you are capable of. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Find ways to get connected with your community, and keep company with people who support you.
Most of all, enjoy the process
“The soul has been given it’s own ears to hear things that the mind does not understand” Rumi
with love
Noelle