When I say a half-empty or half-full type of person, what do you believe you are? If we saw ourselves through these character types it might be oversimplifying but it could help us see ourselves more clearly. I don’t want to minimize the complexity of our lives and lived experiences, and I’m not suggesting things are entirely one way or the other. I am toying with this idea, our characters, and the way we see the world is not fixed, it changes as we change.
From my observations, I would say that a glass half-empty person is more reserved, is reluctant to put themselves out socially, frequently judges themselves and others, blames outside circumstances and people for their life situation, and lacks a general sense of aw for life.
Glass half-full person tends to be vivacious, curious, full of life, and experiences life as full of opportunities. Is interested in connection with others and tends to live in their worth rather than being directed by limiting believes of themselves.
When I’m living glass half-empty I look at my body and see cellulite, unwanted weight, wrinkles, essentially in this mindset I become obsessive about food, exercise, and wanting to be seen as more attractive by others. When I’m living in a glass-full I see a healthy body, I’m kind with the words I speak to myself, I feel worthy of kindness from others.
To break it down more (he = half-empty, hf = Half-full):
he – See others as threats or competition – in business, life, dating, financially, family, kids, and socially.
hf – Experiences other’s as having different gifts than themselves and regularly able to celebrate other people’s achievements. See’s people as cohorts versus competition.
or
he – Use exhaustion as a consistent reason to disengage from society and connecting with others. Feels like giving or supporting others is a hard most of the time.
hf – Use exhaustion as a time to sleep more and take care of self but continue finding ways to connect with others and be of service to friends and family.
or
he – Experience devastation, heartbreak, pain, or trauma in their lives and spends the rest of their life feeling like a victim and something horrible happened that they couldn’t recover from.
hf – Experience a devastation, heartbreak, pain, or trauma and took time for grieving and healing. Focused on what the experience gave to them and used that to create wisdom and more compassion for themselves and others. I.E Someone loses a house in a fire and although immensely impacted seeks support and therapy and focuses on recovering emotionally – can view this as an opportunity to start fresh and rebuild rather than inhabiting a state of constant fear and pain.
or
he – See your own struggles as weaknesses, experience your failures as something you did wrong, and keep yourself small or unseen so that others don’t see your imperfections. Strives for constant perfection and control.
hf – See your struggles as a place for growth, value failures for the lessons it brought to your life and doesn’t worry about what others think. Keeps taking risks.
or
he – Spend your time on social media liking and responding to everyone’s posts, and might even regularly give gifts or do for others, not because you’re generous but because you’re afraid of people not liking you. Filling the need for being liked by endlessly engaging in behaviour that gives the illusion of generosity.
hf – Spend little or no time on social media, use your time doing things that bring you joy or fulfillment. Choosing to gift give to lift someone else up and not obsessing about being liked.
None of these examples are designed to shame us, as I’ve been on both sides of these depending on how I’m doing in my life. However, when I was consistently living in the glass half-empty realm, my life was depleting, I couldn’t see opportunities, fixating on negative stories about myself, felt exhausted and unsupported, and I was sad and had a negative outlook on the world. When I see the world from a half-full perspective the world feels brighter, I have energy to engage in the world, I want to be of service to others, and I feel joy and pleasure often. I’m calmer and I don’t tend to fixate on stories that make me feel unworthy.
If you feel perpetually in the half-empty zone, you may need some support and prioritize healing by working with someone trained in counselling, talk therapy, body centered psychotherapy practices/somatic practices and or trauma work. But you don’t have to stay in the half-empty place, even as you’re working through your stuff. It’s part of being human, understanding ourselves and awareness for our areas for growth and healing. It’s not a place for judgement and criticism, because when we do that we’re living half-empty. As always reflection and slow shifts.
With love,
Noelle