I have BIG fears. They revolve around being judged and failing. I haven’t let them stop me from pushing myself to do some pretty incredible things in my life that I am proud of. However, for a long time I held myself back in so many ways: I was scared of putting myself out there. Of failing and being thought to be a fool. Eventually, I got bored of holding myself back, and the desire to step into the things I wanted to do pushed me out of the fear. I just knew I needed to do push myself because I was starting to feel smothered by my own insecurity.
We are all afraid of being judged.
When I started writing my Mindful Monday blog, I was scared as hell of what people would say, but I realized that my desire to remain small because of fear was getting really boring. I dug in and found the courage to just step into it. I have received lots of incredible and heartfelt feedback, but I have also received some pretty aggressive and unsupported responses. You know what? Those who don’t love what I do are actually no concern of mine. I let those comments float off my back easily because I am in love with what I am doing. It comes from a kind place in me, and I feel comforted and constantly push myself to try the next thing, to get uncomfortable and take the next step, which is changing and evolving as I take on one dream at a time.
I realized that the idea of never following my dreams was more terrifying than living a life without risk. To come to the end, whether it be tomorrow or 40 years from now, if I never tried to do the things I dreamed of, I would feel like I failed this life. That isn’t how I want to experience this one precious life of mine.
I also realize that I will fail, that failure isn’t a negative thing. It is only scary in our minds. In reality, failing is the biggest teacher. Of course in the moment of failing, it can feel awful, but I know, in my own experiences, that I have learned MORE from my failures then from my successes.
“Be about 10 times more magnanimous than you believe yourself capable of being. Your life will be 100 times better for it” ~ Cheryl Strayed
What are you holding yourself back from? What are you scared of being judged for? Let’s get real. It’s totally intimidating to put yourself out there. To do something you may have never done before. To follow a big dream or to take a risk. But what is worse? To have never tried, or to have tried and failed. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
May we all find the courage to blow past our own limiting thoughts.
with love
Noelle
I’m Afraid Of Being Judged
