Our brain is designed to secrete thoughts, to endlessly process and ruminate on the stories of our lives. However, we tend to give all our authority over to our brain. We believe the endless stream of thoughts that plow through our minds, seemingly without choice. But science shows that we can choose our thoughts. We can learn to control the endless stream of ideas that pops up in our minds. We don’t have to feel like a victim of our minds. We can make shifts in regards to what and how we think.
I remember when I believed all of my thoughts; I accepted whatever came into my mind as truth. I felt out of control. I was sure no one else was having the dark thoughts I was experiencing. My thoughts could ruin my days or make me feel at peace. I could feel alone and unloved, or like the world was conspiring against me. There was a part of me that thought that was BS: how could my brain dictate how I was to feel any on given day – out of my control?
It occurred to me that I could shift my life by believing I was worthy of feeling good. I began to watch my thoughts and to pay attention to what was coming up. As I did, I noticed the unkind things I was thinking and believing about myself. I started to see how I believed that I wasn’t good enough in so many aspects of my life: I wasn’t worthy of loving people; I wasn’t good enough to be treated well by others or to have the life I wanted; I wasn’t deserving of happiness or contentment; I wasn’t capable enough to have the career I wanted. Because I believed these stories, my thoughts constantly reinforced those beliefs. I concocted stories to make me feel certain that they were true.
I think most of us can feel that way. I find I can still get caught in this program on occasion.
We can shift our reality by choosing how we want to feel. It is so simple, yet it can be so profound. If you take the time to think about what you want to feel, and why you want to feel that way, you will realize you have the ability to make profound changes in your life.
I wanted to feel different in my day to day life, so I needed to believe in different things. You can do this by acknowledging the thoughts that are not serving you. When you witness your thoughts, you can change them. You can choose to think something else and question why you believe your thoughts to be true.
The next step is to figure out if your thoughts align with the way you want to feel. If they don’t, you can shift your beliefs about yourself by first acknowledging the limiting thought, and then (without judgment) move toward a kinder thought that aligns you with how you want to feel.
I don’t want to minimize the dark thoughts: they exist because of specific events that happen in our lives, profound events. However, most of us don’t pay enough attention to recognize where the feeling or thoughts originated from, but still we give them the authority to direct our futures.
There are two practices that can fundamentally help you shift your thoughts:
- Pay attention to your thoughts. Decide if you want to believe those thoughts and whether or not they are serving you.
- Meditate. Meditation isn’t just about sitting down on a cushion and finding stillness in your mind. It is about creating white space so you can notice what your mind is doing, and what you need to process. In doing this, you may find moments of space between your thoughts as you acknowledge what you haven’t yet had an opportunity to pay attention to.
Deciding that you have choice over how you feel is essential to living a wholehearted life. It is key to living the life you want to live instead of feeling like you are held captive in your thoughts.
How do you want to feel today?
With love
Noelle
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