I adore words. They create a symphony of experiences. They inspire us, they anger us, they instill deep respect, they wound us or tear friendships apart. Words are powerful. Words start wars, bring peace or introduce anxiety. They hold power. They can dominate or be generous. Words can embody, beautify or hold fire.
Words can be used as weapons or as peace makers. Words have a power that is worth paying attention to. Understand that you’ve been gifted with a power that shouldn’t be taken lightly, the power that language holds. You can create long-term pain in someone’s life when you fire them off without thought. Words can inspire trust or a lack of respect. Words hold ignorance, sexism, racism, entitlement, love, kindness, anger, passion, lust, gratitude hate and generosity.
Maya Angelou said it so beautifully: “Words are things. You must be careful about the words you use. Or the words you allow to be used in your house. I think they are things, they get in the walls, they get in the upholstery, into rugs, into your clothes and finally into you.”
A few weeks ago, I sent an email titled “The Power Of Your Thoughts.” Consider this part 2 of that email. The next step in managing the train of your thoughts is navigating the words that move those thoughts. It is time to refine your language and understand that your language has power, whether you are using it in your outer world or inner world.
I was recently listening to 5-time New York Times bestselling author Caroline Myss speak about the power of words. She emphasized that words hold power. Specifically, we have each chosen words that are devastating to us, words that are unique to each of us, and most of us never reveal what those words are. Or worse: if those words are used towards us, in certain tones, they will devastate our relationships and create limits to our connections all because, with language, someone crosses a line that they did not know existed.
Do you use your words to sway someone else’s perspective in your favor? I certainly have. I’ve also unknowingly used the wrong words, upsetting people by simply trying to get my point across, then suffering as a result of the impossibility of knowing another person’s internal language and its limits.
The quality, intention, tone and emotion behind your words make an impact. If you’re having a bad day, it’s likely that the words you choose to use will reflect that. Whether you have a pinched jaw as you force out “I’m fine” or lose your marbles with your child in the middle of the grocery store (I may have had a moment or two like that), your words are a direct reflection of who you are, what you believe and how you decide to show up in the world. With that knowledge, how do you want to use them?
We stress about things we have said or how we said them. We can end up in the deep, dark corners of our minds by allowing others’ words to penetrate our inner sanctum, giving up our peace. We can also use our own words with this vicious, destructive force.
When you want to become physically fit, you work out, eat right, and take great care of your body. It’s a lifelong practice, and it becomes a way of life. It is the same thing with choosing your words and understanding the power that your words hold. It’s about building muscle memory, the same way we build our body. We need to feed our minds with healthy habits. You can choose to shift your language to promote the kind of life and relationships you desire to create. You can choose to be selective with your words and to allow for others to speak while you take sips of space to collect your words.
How could you clean out your language? How could you use your language in mindful ways, not to manipulate but to respect the power of words so that you choose wisely? So that you choose to move with care? With mindful movement, it eventually becomes a way of life. You build the muscles that are required to pay attention and show up for yourself.
May we all choose to find ways to create peace with our words.
with love
Noelle